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Lacking Confidence

Confidence Recharged. Success Strategies for Midlife Women

November 12, 202310 min read

Does your confidence need a Boost?

What's the secret sauce that gives some women that unmistakable & seemingly effortless confidence? You might think it's just something they're born with, but guess what? It's all about the habits they've picked up along the way.

The Power of Confidence

confidence

Confidence isn't just a buzzword, Confidence is that unseen force that propels powerhouse women to own their space, set their mark, and truly thrive. They trust their gut, stand tall, and don’t wait for someone else to pat them on the back. 

While the world’s busy selling us "confidence" in a bottle, we know the real deal comes from within. True confidence isn't about a new dress, a toned body, or the latest car. It's an unwavering inner belief that states, "I've got this. Im enough."

Why is confidence in women so important? Because … Confidence equals action! It lights a fire under women to speak, write, stand up, fight, dive into politics, and kickstart businesses. But the flipside? Lack of confidence can stifle not only personal growth but also meaningful contributions to our communities. This isn’t just a ‘women’s issue.’ It’s an everyone issue. Because when women soar, society flourishes.


Breaking Down The Stats

To appreciate how critical this issue is, especially for midlife women, let's look at some numbers:

Confident with your looks

  • Only 27% of women are giving their mirror the thumbs up, while a whopping 72% sometimes wish they could change what they see.

  • Men apply for jobs when they sort of fit the bill, while women? We often hold back unless we tick every. single. box.

  • About 75% of us face the dreaded imposter syndrome at various times in our lives. Yep, that's three out of every four.

  • Hitting your 40s and 50s? It's common to feel a dip in that "I can conquer the world" feeling.


Is Your Confidence Wavering? Here’s How to Recognise the Signs:

Women Confidence Wavering

1. Self-Doubt Creeping In

A staggering 85% of women report experiencing self-doubt in their professional lives, leading to reduced productivity and job dissatisfaction.

Do you often find yourself doubting your abilities, second-guessing decisions, or feeling like an imposter at work? These are common signs that your self-confidence may need a boost.

2. Perfectionism Takes Control

63% of us are stuck chasing perfection. If your mantra is “It's 100% or nothing”, let's rethink that.

Are you constantly striving for perfection in everything you do? Perfectionism can paralyze you, making it difficult to move forward and accomplish your goals.

3. Fear of Failure Holds You Back

A staggering 75% of us are putting our dreams on hold, scared of failing. This can prevent us from taking calculated risks and pursuing opportunities.

Are you avoiding new challenges or hesitating to take on leadership roles due to the fear of failing? This fear can limit your potential and stifle your personal and professional growth.

Strategies for Boosting Self-Confidence

Women Self Doubt at work


1. Embrace Self-Compassion

Turns out, self-compassion and being kind to ourselves boosts confidence in 72% of women. 

Start by treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer a close friend. Self-compassion involves acknowledging your mistakes and imperfections without harsh self-criticism.

Quick Wins:

  • Pump up the positive self-talk.

  • Switch out self-criticism for self-encouragement & a mental high-five.

  • Embrace the perfectly imperfect you.

2. Set Realistic Goals

Women who set achievable goals are 60% more likely to build self-confidence.

Instead of setting lofty, unattainable goals, focus on smaller, manageable steps towards your ultimate objectives. Celebrate each achievement along the way, boosting your confidence as you progress.

Quick Wins:

  • Break down your goals into smaller milestones.

  • Create a clear action plan.

  • Recognize and celebrate your successes.


3. Challenge Negative Thoughts

On average, women have 60,000 thoughts a day, and for many, a significant portion of these thoughts are self-critical.

Know your negative self-talk patterns and work on challenging and reframing them. Replace self-doubt with constructive, empowering thoughts.

Quick wins:

  • Keep a journal to track negative thoughts. 

  • Analyze and challenge these thoughts.

  • Replace negative thoughts with affirmations and positive self-talk.

4. Seek Support and Mentorship

Women with a mentor or a support network are 50% more likely to build self-confidence.

Don't hesitate to seek guidance and support from trusted mentors, colleagues, or friends. Sharing your challenges with others can provide valuable perspectives and encouragement.

Quick wins:

  • Identify potential mentors or support groups.

  • Reach out for guidance and advice.

  • Build a network of like-minded individuals.


5. Continuous Learning and Skill Development

Women who invest in learning and skill development are 40% more confident in their abilities.

Commit to lifelong learning and skill enhancement. Acquiring new knowledge and honing your skills can significantly boost your self-confidence.

Quick wins:

  • Identify areas for skill improvement.

  • Take courses, attend workshops, or seek certifications.

  • Keep up-to-date with industry trends.

Boosting Self-Confidence in Your Professional Life

Confidence in Professional Life

1. Cultivate a Growth Mindset

Women who adopt a growth mindset are 35% more likely to take on challenging roles and responsibilities.

Shift your mindset from fixed to growth-oriented. Embrace challenges as opportunities for growth and view failures as learning experiences.

Action Steps:

  • Embrace challenges and view them as opportunities.

  • Learn from setbacks and adjust your approach.

  • Continuously seek ways to improve your skills.

2. Assertiveness and Effective Communication

Women who develop assertiveness skills are 45% more likely to advance in their careers.

Effective communication and assertiveness are key to career success. Practice assertive communication to express your thoughts, needs, and ideas confidently.

Action Steps:

  • Practice assertive communication in everyday situations.

  • Seek feedback to improve your communication skills.

  • Use clear and concise language to convey your message.

3. Set Boundaries

Women who set and maintain boundaries in the workplace are 55% more satisfied with their jobs.

Establish clear boundaries to protect your time and energy. Learn to say no when necessary, and prioritize self-care to prevent burnout.

Action Steps:

  • Identify your boundaries and communicate them.

  • Learn to say no when it aligns with your values.

  • Make self-care a non-negotiable part of your routine.

Boosting Self-Confidence in Your Personal Life

Confidence in Personal LIfe

1. Self-care and Well-Being

Women who prioritize self-care are 60% more satisfied with their personal lives.

Taking care of your physical and emotional well-being is essential for building self-confidence. Make self-care a priority in your daily routine.

Action Steps:

  • Develop a self-care plan tailored to your needs.

  • Practice mindfulness and stress management techniques.

  • Prioritize sleep, nutrition, and exercise for overall well-being.

2. Building Resilience

Resilient women are 50% more likely to navigate personal challenges with confidence.

Life can throw unexpected challenges your way. Building resilience will enable you to bounce back from setbacks and maintain a positive outlook.

Action Steps

  • Develop problem-solving skills.

  • Cultivate a support system for tough times.

  • Focus on personal growth and adaptability.

3. Celebrate Your Achievements

Women who celebrate their achievements experience a 70% boost in self-confidence.

Acknowledge your accomplishments, both big and small. Celebrate your successes as they happen to reinforce your self-confidence.

Action Steps:

  • Keep a success journal.

  • Reward yourself for achieving milestones.

  • Share your achievements with friends and family.

In your journey to boost self-confidence, remember it's a process that requires time, patience, and consistent effort. By recognising the signs of self-doubt, implementing these strategies, and nurturing self-confidence in both your professional and personal life, you can take control of your future. 

The statistics are clear: building self-confidence is not only possible but also highly beneficial for your career and overall well-being.

Know that you have the potential to achieve your goals and overcome self-doubt, you're capable of making your dreams come true & your journey begins with believing in yourself.

How to appear Effortlessly Confident & In Control

Effortlessly Confident Woman

Here are some of my favorite habits to adopt to appear effortlessly confident and in control, even if you don't necessarily feel it!

1. Know your Stuff

   You've got to be the expert in your field, no two ways about it. When you know your stuff inside out, you speak with an air of confidence that's hard to miss. Confidence comes from being well-prepared and knowing your area of expertise like the back of your hand.

2. Own your Presence

   Even when you're feeling a bit shaky, your body language can be a game-changer. Stand tall, shoulders back, and head held high. Project the image of someone in control, even when you might not feel like it.

3. Start Small, Aim High

   Think of it like training for a marathon. You build your confidence by hitting those small milestones first. Set achievable goals and then let your successes pave the way to greater confidence.

4. Dress for Success

   Your clothes can be your secret weapon. When you feel good in what you're wearing, it shows. Dress for the position you want, not the one you have.

5. Invest in Yourself

   Feeling and looking good go hand in hand with confidence. Take care of your physical and mental well-being. Regular self-care, good sleep, and staying active can boost your confidence in no time.

6. Surround yourself with Positivity

   Hang out with people who lift you up. Positive influences can do wonders for your self-esteem. Seek out like-minded individuals who empower you.

7. Practice Mindfulness

   Ever heard of living in the moment? Mindfulness is all about that. When you're fully present and engaged in the now, your confidence naturally shines through.

8. Create your own Style

   Forget labels and logos. Confident women carve out their own style and identity. Embrace what makes you unique.

9. Live with Passion

   Passion is a confidence booster like no other. When you're passionate about something, you exude confidence. Weakness doesn't stand a chance.

10. Live Life Your Way

    Happiness is the cornerstone of self-esteem. Do what makes you happy, and watch your confidence soar.

11. Embrace the Unknown

    Stepping out of your comfort zone is empowering. Trying new things adds to your confidence; you'll have stories to share from your adventures.

12. Take Control

    In both your personal and professional life, take the reins. Make your own decisions and stand by them. Confidence stems from knowing you're the one calling the shots.

13. Be Bold! Be Brave!

    Don't shy away from taking risks. As Adele says, "Be brave and fearless." Facing your fears head-on is a surefire way to boost your self-confidence.

14. Balance Yes and No

    Learning to say no when necessary is a skill. Setting boundaries is a source of pride and strength.

15. Stay Positive

    Positivity breeds confidence. Keeping a sunny outlook can do wonders for your professional journey.

16. Lead in Your Personal Life

    In dating and relationships, take the lead. Confidence comes from knowing you're in control of your own destiny.

17. Lift Other Women Up

    Confident women empower each other. Supporting others in reaching their goals shows that you're in control of your own success.

18. Fearlessly Go Solo

    A confident woman can walk into any room alone and leave with a handful of new connections.

19. Cultivate a Growth Mindset

    Confident women are lifelong learners. Being open to new experiences and lessons is a sign of true confidence.

20. Instill Confidence in Your Daughters

    Teach your daughters the art of making their own choices, earning their own keep, and learning from their own mistakes. These are the foundations of confidence.

21. Choose Your Inner Circle Wisely

    Surround yourself with people who build you up, not tear you down. Confidence is nurtured by the company you keep.

22. Define Your Worth

   Your worth is not determined by others' opinions. It's based on your own assessment of your skills and achievements.

23. Ask Questions, Seek Growth

    Admit when you don't know something, and seize the opportunity to learn and grow. Embrace every chance to expand your knowledge and expertise.

confidencethriveempowering womenself confidence
blog author image

Lara Pennington Ellis

Hey I’m Lara, a dual-accredited ICF Executive & Career Change Coach & I help midlife women from all over the world make positive changes in their lives & careers. I love helping women like YOU who want MORE out of life … Success, Freedom, Balance, Happiness & Fun! I'm a British/Spanish woman who's lived & worked overseas for most of my life. I've experienced first-hand, multiple life & career transitions while juggling work & family. I’ve been there & understand the challenges women face in combining a career we love, with the life we want! I’m passionate about Empowering Women to Thrive & I believe if you can Dream it … you can DO IT! Discover What's Next? Reignite your Life & Turbocharge your Career WITHOUT running away to Eat-Pray-Love! Imagine waking up every day feeling fabulous, fulfiled & successful, living a balanced life bursting with happiness, fun & freedom. Are you ready to EVOLVE your Life & Career?

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